Trauma, PTSD and Sleep: Why Your Mind Won’t Switch Off at Night — and How I Can Help
Why your mind won’t switch off at night
If you’ve experienced a traumatic or frightening or upsetting event, even in the past, bedtime can become one of the hardest parts of the day.
The moment you lie down and everything becomes quiet, your mind may suddenly feel busy, alert or on edge.
You might feel anxious, restless, or unable to relax — even when you are exhausted.
For many people, night-time is when present and past traumas shows up most strongly.
How trauma affects sleep
Trauma keeps the nervous system in survival mode or Fight and Flight mode
At night you may notice:
- difficulty relaxing or “switching off”
- racing thoughts or anxiety at bedtime
- nightmares or vivid dreams
- waking suddenly or feeling on alert
- feeling exhausted but unable to sleep deeply
Although it sounds strange, this is your nervous system trying to protect you, by switching on your Flight and Fight mode. It can still be there, even a long time after the event, when you might have almost forgotten about it.
Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) is often associated with military or emergency services, but trauma can affect anyone who has experienced fear, shock or helplessness.
This may include:
- road accidents
- medical events
- bereavement or sudden loss
- violent or distressing experiences
- workplace stress or burnout
- long periods of illness or uncertainty
Sometimes sleep problems begin soon after the event.
Sometimes they appear months or even years later.
Common night-time trauma symptoms
People often experience:
- flashbacks or intrusive memories
- nightmares
- distressing images or sensations
- sweating, nausea or trembling
- guilt or repeatedly replaying events
When this happens at night, the brain can start to associate bed with danger instead of rest.
The good news is this pattern can be gently changed, without putting you through more trauma.
How I can help
Alongside sleep coaching, we focus on calming the nervous system and helping your mind feel safe again at night.
We work gently and at your pace.
There are some very effective, very gentle techniques that can help.
Working with the root cause
Trauma keeps the brain stuck in the past.
Using gentle therapeutic approaches, we help the nervous system recognise that the event is over and that you are safe now.
As this shifts, many people notice their nights begin to settle naturally.
1. The NLP Rewind Technique for Trauma
One approach that can be particularly helpful for traumatic memories is the NLP Rewind Technique. This gentle method helps the brain re-process distressing memories so they no longer trigger the same emotional and physical reactions.
Rather than repeatedly talking through the event, the technique allows the memory to be processed safely and at a comfortable distance. Many people find that the memory begins to feel as though it belongs firmly in the past, instead of something their nervous system is still reacting to in the present.
This approach has been widely used with trauma survivors, including military veterans. One well-known case described by Steve Andreas involved an Iraq veteran who had been unable to sleep without keeping two guns by her bed for safety. After using the rewind process, her nervous system was able to relax again and she was finally able to sleep peacefully.
Steve Andreas has a brilliant video this. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xC5AmriQse4
2. The Butterfly Hug - A Very Simple Technique to Try
One gentle technique that many people find calming is called the Butterfly Hug. It comes from EMDR trauma therapy and was originally developed to help people settle their nervous system after distressing experiences.
It is very simple to do and can even be used while lying in bed.
Cross your arms over your chest so that your hands rest on your upper arms or shoulders, like a butterfly with folded wings. Then gently tap one hand and then the other in a slow, steady rhythm.
Left… right… left… right.
There is no need to rush. Slow, comfortable tapping works best.
As you do this, let your breathing settle and simply notice the movement and the rhythm. Many people find that after a minute or two their body begins to relax and their mind feels a little quieter.
The gentle left–right movement is known as bilateral stimulation, which is also used in EMDR therapy. Research suggests that this kind of rhythmic stimulation can help calm the nervous system and support the brain in processing stressful experiences.
The Butterfly Hug was first introduced by EMDR therapists Lucina Artigas and Ignacio Jarero, who used it to help survivors of major disasters regulate their emotions. Since then it has been used widely as a simple self-soothing technique.
If you wake during the night feeling tense or on edge, it may be worth giving it a try.
You can read more about the Butterfly Hug and how to use it here.
2. Retraining the brain for sleep
Once the nervous system begins to calm, we work on restoring your natural sleep ability.
Your mind and body already know how to sleep.
We simply help remove the fight-or-flight response that appears at bedtime and rebuild a sense of safety in bed.
3. Relaxation and self-hypnosis tools
You’ll learn techniques you can use at home to:
- calm your mind at night
- settle anxiety in the body
- reduce pain or physical tension
- reinforce the progress we make in sessions
Many clients find these tools invaluable between sessions.
4. Meditation and nervous system support
A simple daily meditation can make a huge difference to trauma-related sleep difficulties.
You don’t need to stop thoughts or sit in uncomfortable positions.Just a few minutes twice a day can help your nervous system move out of survival mode and into rest.
5. Lifestyle and sleep coaching
Trauma often affects habits, routines and coping strategies.: I can help you by
- reducing reliance on alcohol or stimulants
- improving bedtime routines
- adjusting daily rhythm and stress levels
- creating a bedroom environment that feels safe and calm
6. The role of a sleep diary
A sleep diary helps us understand your unique sleep pattern and identify changes that will make the biggest difference. You may track:
- sleep quality and patterns
- daytime energy and mood
- routines and daily habits
- stress and relaxation levels
- exercise, food and drink
- caffeine, alcohol or nicotine
This allows your support to be completely personalised.
How many sessions will I need?
Everyone is different. Some people notice significant changes in just 3 or 4 sessions, but you might need more to sort out other factors contributing to your poor sleep and make more lasting lifestyle changes.
If trauma, sleep and habits are all involved, the Sleep Transformation Programme (8 sessions) is often the most supportive option.
You don’t have to manage this alone
Sleep problems after trauma are incredibly common — and very treatable.
With the right support, your mind and body can learn to feel safe at night again.
If you’d like help improving your sleep, you’re very welcome to book a free discovery call to see if I am the right coach for you.
Explore
You might find some of these pages useful
The Crucial Connection between Stress and Quality Sleep
Stress and Sleep How Hypnotherapy, NLP and Meditation can Help You Sleep
How to Switch Off and Fall Asleep
Six Steps to Stop Overwhelm and Get Off to Sleep
The Butterfly Hug: A Simple Technique to Calm Anxiety and Settle Your Mind and Body at Night
Pain and Sleep
(once the page is live)
Menopause and Sleep
(if it exists yet)
Research - Butterfly Hug
• Artigas, Jarero & colleagues – EMDR Integrative Group Treatment Protocol
• International Society for Traumatic Stress Studies (ISTSS)
• EMDR International Association
• Research summaries from Institute for Psycho-Trauma (IPT)
https://iptrauma.org/new-research-validates-the-butterfly-hug-as-a-evidence-based-trauma-tool/